Chapter 126 – the rant

2 08 2009

I planned for Honorine’s life to develop in this manner, but I never imagined how much I’d sympathise with her.  The word “shut-in” hit home rather harder than I could have predicted it would.

You know what I really dislike?  When an author starts a story and then abandons it midway, betraying the readers in the process.

I screwed up.  I honestly don’t know what happened.  I wouldn’t blame you if you thought I’d given up on this story, because you have only my word – and you do have my word – that I didn’t.

Lately, I’ve just lost touch with everything, and everyone.  I haven’t been playing guitar, I haven’t been playing piano, haven’t been reading; I’ve lost contact with people, online and even somewhat offline, and not realised how long it’s been until, well, now.  Offline, I have the lame excuse that I have no money and no job, but online I don’t even have that.

There are so many things I should have blogged, but didn’t.  At the moment I find myself very much sympathising with sulz, who I only just learned is stopping blogging indefinitely.  I don’t have her excuses, but like sulz, somehow my heart just hasn’t been in writing lately.

I read a post on Museditions’ blog earlier which I think has made me realise my problem: I’ve been wanting to blog out of necessity – that is, desire to complete the story – but I have had little interest in the blogging itself.

For this reason,I’m not going to insult your intelligence as readers by making more promises.  The fact is, I don’t know if I’ll update regularly.  I am clearly not reliable.  I hate myself so much for this, but I think it’s one of those things I need to face up to.  Of course, I’ll try to update regularly.  But, well, I’m a hypocrite.

And I’m tired, so I need to wrap this post up, but I think I should mention:

Brüno and The Half-Blood Prince

I’ve been to the cinema twice since I last posted.  I went with friends to see Brüno, and I went with my family to see Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (well, it would hardly have been the other way around!).

That’s right, innocent little Bobby G watched Brüno.  And for the most part, I was entertained by it, although it was extremely crass in places.  It’s a mark of how jaded the Internet has left me that the only thing that really shocked me in the movie was the attitudes of the stage parents.  Oh, and the fact that he was still alive after that comment about Osama bin Laden.  (Oh good grief, I think I lost my innocence to imageboards! 😦 )

I don’t know why I even joked about that.  It seriously bothers me that I’m not as innocent as I was.  That’s my personality I’m losing.

I had been extremely apprehensive about this new Harry Potter film, and I was especially upset to learn that it left out Luna’s commentary scene, which is the best moment in the entire series, but I was pleasantly surprised by the film.  They didn’t have the commentary scene, but it was nevertheless an excellent adaptation of the novel, and possibly my favourite Harry Potter movie so far.  The acting was a lot better than that of the previous film, which certainly helped.  The characters were very convincing this time around; Malfoy, Luna, Slughorn and Lavender really were Malfoy, Luna, Slughorn and Lavender.  There was something a little odd about hearing Harry say the word “tosser”, but he is supposed to be sixteen by this point (of course, he looks a deal older).  If you haven’t seen it, I definitely recommend this movie.

Goodness, I’m tired.  I have no idea how I’ll be up in good time tomorrow at this rate.  It’s 3:20 already.

Goodnight!

Current listening: S Club 7, “Don’t Stop Movin'”





Chapter 125 – the rant

3 07 2009

Woah, it’s a while since I’ve posted one of these.  But then, if you’re reading this, you probably noticed.  I can’t apologise enough for that.  Sorry.

Leaver’s Day, Revenge of the Fallen, and a meme from a muse

Lately, I’ve been feeling a little odd.  I’ve isolated myself, both online and offline.  But, this is neither the time nor the place for me to angst, especially when I’ve very little to angst about.  Besides, this is only my third post in a while, so I probably shouldn’t push my luck by trying everyone’s patience.

I meant to post this chapter yesterday, but what with one thing and another, I’m afraid I failed to find the time.  You see, yesterday was leaver’s day at school, which meant we all had to go in, sit around feeling boiling, bored and depressed, eat lunch, listen to a short assembly, and go home again.  They mispelled my name in the yearbook, but that’s OK, because I didn’t order one.  I did order a commemorative hoodie, but apparently I didn’t pay for it, so they’re going to hold onto it until I do so.

After that, I went home, made dinner, and then went off to the cinema.  I’d gotten a text that morning from a few friends who were back from uni, who were going to see the new Transformers movie.  Unfortunately, one guy was late, so we changed times to a later showing.  He didn’t show up, so I volunteered to wait outside with his ticket while the others found seats.  Fifteen minutes into the film, he still hadn’t arrived, so I gave up and went in, and was informed that I’d “missed loads of explosions already”.

I can’t honestly say I enjoyed the movie very much.  I’d hesitate to say I enjoyed it less than Twilight, but I wasn’t expecting to enjoy that, and I think it was possibly the better movie (please don’t hurt me!).  It probably didn’t help that I haven’t seen the original, so I didn’t know the characters, but I arrived in time to see bland Optimus Prime deliver a boring speech, and see Sam, his parents and his goofy roommate get up to moronic hijinks at college (note to Michael Bay, if by some minute chance you ever read this – people on pot do not act like that).

When we did get an action scene, involving a Decepticon named (spoiler) Alice, it was an enjoyable spectacle, and the later ones were even better.  I particularly liked the fight scene in which Optimus Prime dual-wielded a couple of glowy sword things.  Unfortunately, I couldn’t suspend my disbelief enough to form any attachment to the characters or take an interest in the plot, because the characters are so ridiculous.  When stuff isn’t blowing up on screen, we’re subjected to rather boring comedy, usually involving some combination of slapstick, innuendo and testicles.  Particularly crass are a couple of Autobots named Skid and Mudflap, two annoying ethnic stereotypes who make Jar-Jar Binks seem positively endearing by comparison.

Still, if you cut out those Autobot twins, with their ghetto slang, their illiteracy and their failure to do anything useful in terms of moving the story forward, and if you cut out the “hilarious” comedy scenes involving tasers and pot brownies, it could have been an enjoyable action flick.  As it was, it was far too long.  I did phone home beforehand to let my parents know it was a long movie, but the phone was engaged and they didn’t check their messages, so when I emerged from the cinema at midnight, it was to discover a concerned text message, which seemed to assume I’d been out drinking.

If I hadn’t forgotten about my email account lately, I’d have discovered that Museditions emailed me a while back with a meme to complete.  So, very belatedly, here it is:

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?

“My hair looks terrible!”

2. How much cash do you have in your wallet right now?

£1.50.  That’s not all the money I have in the world, but you see why I’m getting slightly desperate on the job hunting thing.

3. Do you label yourself?

Yes, although I’m not sure it’s a good idea, especially since I think I’m neither sufficiently normal to be mainstream, nor suffiently computer literate or aware of anime and video games to be a proper nerd.

4. What does your watch look like?

Small, black, electronic.  It’s very cheap.  I do own a better one, but I’m scared of scratching it, so I don’t wear it!  Plus it’s in analogue time, which always takes me a moment to read, since I’m so used to my digital watch.

5. What were you doing at midnight last night?

Just leaving the cinema having seen Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen.

6. What’s a word that you say a lot?

“Actually”.  I say it all the time offline.  I correct myself, I correct other people, I use it for emphasis or even just as filler.  I really ought to stop using that word!

7. Who told you he/she loved you last?

A really creepy old guy I met down the pub the other day, disturbingly enough.  He told me that repeatedly.  I made an excuse and ran away at the first opportunity.

8. Last furry thing you touched?

No idea.  Probably the neighbour’s dog.

9. What was the last thing you said to someone?

“Goodnight, dad.”

10. The last song you listened to?

“The Masses against the Classes”, by Manic Street Preachers.

11. Where did you live five years ago?
 

Same place I live now.

12. Are you jealous of anyone?

People who are totally content with who they are, I suppose.

13. Is anyone jealous of you?

Hah!  Not that I know of.

14. Name three things that you have on you at all times?

My watch, and – that’s about it.  I don’t keep anything on my person at all times.  I have a tendancy to go out of the house with nothing but the clothes I’m wearing, forgetting my keys, phone, ID…

15. What’s your favourite town/city?

I don’t know.  I’m not a city person.  Probably Cheltenham, although I wouldn’t want to live there (also, it’s kinda snobby).

16. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?

Probably January, sending relatives “thank you” letters.

17. Can you change the oil on a car?

Nope.

18. What is your current desktop picture?

Roy Mustang from Fullmetal Alchemist.  It used to be the TARDIS until quite recently when I decided it was time for a change.

19. When did you start your blog?

March 2007, as part of a school project.  Hence the title.

20. What country would you like to live in other than your own?

I’d rather stay here, but since that’s not allowed, somewhere in Europe.  I wouldn’t mind anywhere in the British Isles, or France, Spain, Germany, Italy, or anywhere in Scandinavia.  That last sentence has gone off the page, so I hope I didn’t just break WordPress.

Thank you for that, Muse.  I enjoyed that. 🙂  I hope you enjoyed it too.

So… back!





An update of sorts

27 06 2009

Hi.

This is going to be a rather inadequate post, but I just wanted to let you guys know I haven’t forgotten about y’all.  I’ve been kinda busy lately; my exams are now done with (I don’t think I did very well), but I’ve been looking for a job, without success, and my sleep pattern is kinda whack, which is my fault.

Currently I’m working on getting a few things straightened out with my story; I’m also thinking of including some more serious posts here, possibly on a media studies theme, and generally spruce this place up a bit.

Thank you all for your patience and support.





Chapter 121 – the rant

7 04 2009

I meant to post this on Monday, but Tuesday midnight came and it still wasn’t finished. 😦  There may be a pause before I post any other chapters, although I’ll do my best.  I don’t have any written at the moment.

Something about these more exposition-y chapters never seems convincing.  I’m not happy with it, but any later posting would be rather unrealistic, so this will have to do.

***

I’m not very well.  I have a cold and a sore throat, so I feel pretty rotten.  I was supposed to be meeting some friends today and go bowling; we were going to meet up at 12:00.  I was woken at 12:20 by one of them phoning me to ask where I was.  When I tried to answer, I discovered my voice was going.  So I explained as best I could that I couldn’t get there in time, and if I did I’d only infect them all.  So today rather sucks.

What’s worse, dad had a cold yesterday, so I’ve probably caught it from him, and he was much worse today.  And yesterday we were visiting our Scottish relatives and my 80-something-year-old grandpa, so I hope we haven’t given them our disease, but we probably have.

I’m also disturbed to note that right-clicking a link no longer seems to do anything.  I hope I don’t have a computer virus on top of the real life one.

I’m too tired to talk about any other stuff.  I’m really not well.  I apologise for not having been following anyone’s blog recently.  I’m in a completely disorganised and wiped out state.





Chapter 81 – Are We Forever Gone?

2 01 2009

(CloudsAreGatheringOverMe)

We are the rats
Darting away through the sewers
We are the cockroaches
Scuttling across the floor
We are the prey
And predators are everywhere
All we can do is
Make a break for the door

Will we see you again?
Are we forever gone?
Is this going to end?
Because it’s gone on far too long

I am a small target
But I’m in a room full of snipers
I’m a needle in a haystack
But the haystack’s ablaze
I am a victim
And I don’t know what’s happening
All I can do is run
Run far, far away

I do not want your sympathy
I only want somewhere to shout
That’s the only way to let
My bottled-up emotions out

Will we see you again?
Are we forever gone?
Is this going to end?
Because it’s gone on far too long

I do not want to harm myself
I only want to break the skin
The sensation of pain
Takes my mind off my suffering

I do not want to worry you
I only want someone to hear
But if I draw attention to
Myself, I might just disappear

I am a wanderer
With no choice but to keep moving
I am a crying child
So far away from home
I am a whiner
But please forgive me
I can’t control my
Suppressed panic any longer

Will we see you again?
Are we forever gone?
Is this going to end?
Because it’s gone on far too long





Chapter 74 – Another Lonesome Christmas

25 12 2008

(CloudsAreGatheringOverMe)

Happy Christmas guys! Hope you’re enjoying it a lot.

As for me, I’m stuck at home today, but that’s nothing new.

I guess that’s traditional, right? Christmas is a time for family. True enough, but they have their own traditions around here. One of my friends invited me to her annual Christmas party. All my friends are going, and it sounds opti beastie awesome! With one snag – it’s this evening, and I’m still not allowed out in the evenings. I’m told it’s too dangerous. Them Aztec cultists sure are mighty fearsome.

It’s not so bad. This is how I spend every Christmas. No reason this year should be any different, right?

Anyways, I’m rambling. I hope you all have a very Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year!





Chapter 64 – On Being Caged

8 12 2008

(CloudsAreGatheringOverMe)

Right now I’m wondering if I’ll ever be allowed to leave the house ever again, except for school.

Everyone is in a panic about the “Mictlantecuhtli” killings, but my parents, as usual, are more worried than everyone else. They’ve declared that I’m not allowed to leave the house when it’s not light out – and this being the winter, it gets dark before tea time.

I get that they only want me to be safe. The thought of these Aztec cultists is absolutely terrifying. All the same though, it does kind of… well, suck.

You know, back in Hyperborea, I don’t think not being allowed out would really have bothered me. I mean, OK I was younger then, and they didn’t really like me going out in the evenings there anyway, but I never felt any desire to. Since I’ve got here, I’ve just felt so much more independent, and I’ve gone shopping with friends, and eaten at cafes, and watched movies at the cinema. It was fun while it lasted.

Here’s hoping they catch the noxious lunatics responsible for all these attacks soon!