Revenge of the Meme – Musical Version

28 02 2009

Tagged by sulz.  It’s a while since I’ve done a memetic post, so this is probably due.  Sulz created her own “fake album” using the following rules:

This is the cover to the first album from my fake band. You too can have a fake music career. Here’s how it’s done

1 – Go to Wikipedia. Hit “random” or click
The first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band. If it’s already the name of a band, you can hit random again.

2 – Go to “random quotations” or click
The last four or five words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album.

3 – Go to Flickr and click on “explore the last seven days”
or click
Third picture, no matter what it is, will be your album cover.

4 – Use Photoshop or similar to put it all together.

5 – Post it to your blog with this text and tag the blog buddies you want to join in.

So, my own attempt produced this:

Name: Halfway to Heaven

Album title: The Situation Should Be Changed

Album cover: Tower of Moviscrolliosis

And the finished result (courtesy of MS Paint, since I don’t have Photoshop):

 Fake album

(No copyright infringement intended.  Image is property of its original owner.)

Hmm… I’m thinking they’d be alternative rock, with pop punk influences and maybe a slight political angle.  There could be a gothic element there, too, come to think of it.

Now it’s your turn, reader!

Current listening: Morningwood, “That’s How You Know It’s Love”


Chapter 103 – the rant

27 02 2009

I have no idea whether Cardinal Richelieu ever actually read Il Principe.

If anyone recognised the name “AJ Rich”… then I’ll be astounded, because that was ages ago.  But well done if you did.

Chapter 103 – Someone’s been reading my older posts…

27 02 2009


The other day, someone left a comment on Bradley’s blog using the name AJ Rich. That same person also wrote a great long blog post about how Research Team 7 are good people really and how they want to be given a chance.

That can’t be a coincidence. I used the name “AJ Rich” in my first ever blog as a nickname for Cardinal Richelieu, 1585 – 1642, chief minister to the French king Louis XIII. An odd choice, since he’s one of history’s classic “bad guys”.

In my post, I suggested that he was a real-life Machiavellian, who did bad things for the good of France. Is that what Research Team 7 does? Kidnaps people for the greater good? Are they actually trying to justify that??

Oddly, though – and I may just be being incredibly naive here – I can’t help but wonder, what if they really do have good intentions? It’s possible to read that post as expressing a desire to make amends for past misdeeds, and they do sound genuinely apologetic. And as phrased in their blog, the offer sounds undeniably good – providing it’s not a trick.

Bradley keeps saying we should find a way of investigating them without being seen, but if they’re dangerous, that might not be such a good plan. If they caught us sneaking around or spying on them, who knows what they’d do? And I find it hard to imagine they wouldn’t have some kind of surveillance system in place.

At the moment, I’m actually inclined to go and meet them and hear what they have to say. That could be the stupidest suggestion in the world. But all the same, we can’t just do nothing. And dam’t, I’m curious about what this clef actually does!

In other news, it’s cold and it won’t stop raining. Nobody is in a very good mood right now.

Chapter 102 – the rant

25 02 2009

Research Team 7’s perspective.  This was supposed to be a plausible reaction by the organisation, although to be honest, I’m not entirely happy with how it turned out.

This chapter was not written by a deceased French cardinal.


Today I’ve been sooo tired.  I’m not even sure why.  It was a pretty boring day, really.  They’ve pushed the coffee prices up again at school.  They’re now serving it in polystyrene soup cups, which are a lot larger than the mugs they used to use, but they aren’t putting any more coffee in, so it’s a lot weaker than before.  Plus they charge you 5p for the cup.  The same goes for tea.  The tea is kinda gross, too.

Chapter 102 – To Bradley Turner

25 02 2009

(AJ Rich)

Dear Miss Turner,

I am writing on behalf of Research Team Seven. I read your latest blog post, and I understand that you don’t trust us. Under the circumstances, I would be astonished if you did. What was done to you and your friends in Eiriendor City was unacceptable. We are aware of this, and we are very sorry. I realise that no apology can make up for the way in which you were treated.

I will not lie to you. Yes, we want the clef. It was originally the property of individuals associated with Research Team Seven. It was lost, and right now, we need it. I can’t say why here, but I will explain further if you choose to accept our offer. Know this: that we mean you no harm, that our intentions are both legal and benevolent, and that there is more at stake here than you can possibly have guessed. I do not deny that some of the actions which have, in the past, been committed in the name of our cause have been questionable or downright reprehensible, but they were done with the best of intentions. It is no exaggeration to say that human lives depend upon our success.

As it stands, you are in grave danger, not from Research Team Seven, but from a number of other organisations which are also interested in the clef, for various reasons of their own, many of them highly unethical. You have been grievously wronged. You have been threatened, falsely accused, and pursued by hellish abominations.

We at Research Team Seven can offer you protection from all of these things. All we ask in return is the clef, which is of no use to you, but of vital importance to our goals.

Our offer includes shelter, beds, and food. If you accept our offer, you will not be kept as prisoners. You will be free to leave at any time, should you so choose. The offer extends not only to you and your fellow fugitives, but also to the farmers who helped you, should they become threatened.

We are not “the bad guys”, however it may presently appear. Please allow us this chance to correct our mistakes, and make up for the suffering we have caused you. We do not ask for your trust, but we very much desire the opportunity to earn it.

We await your decision at the time and place previously specified.

Chapter 101 – the rant

23 02 2009

Making Bradley angry is pretty much always a very bad idea.


I’m back at school again.  Joy of joys.  In some regards, I’m lucky, because I only have two subjects to worry about, but neither is a subject I’m particularly good at.  Currently, it’s looking like I’ll have to put in a lot of effort to achieve D grades, and I’d much rather have Cs.

Part of my problem is that I’m just not organised.  I don’t get things done.  I’ve never been especially organised, but I’m worse this year.  In an attempt to fix this problem, I’ve bought myself a notebook, which I’ve christened the “Organised Book”.  I’m using it to write to-do lists, mysteries I’m pondering over, dates to remember, a log of all the times my friend has made a gratuitous or unwanted Star Wars reference in conversation (he’s got to be trained not to do that!), and a diary of weird dreams.

The last of these currently contains two entries so far, which are bizarre for entirely different reasons.  The first concerns a dream which ended with my mum going upstairs and advising me not to go to bed too late.  I replied, “Of course not.  I want to get up early tomorrow morning…” and I woke up immediately afterwards.  One of those weird things, I guess.  I distinctly remember the first thing I said after waking up was, “…but not this early!”

The other dream was unusual in a different sense.  I can’t actually remember much about it, but I remember that, in my dream, a certain friend of mine had died several days before.  Almost all my other schoolfriends knew, but I’d only just found out.  When I woke up, I knew I’d been dreaming, but I had this nagging thought that said, well, how did I know that hadn’t happened?  See, all my friends who knew about it in the dream were ones who I hadn’t seen since the start of the half-term break, so it seemed plausible.  Plus when I woke up I was feeling totally drained, like you do when someone really has died.

First thing I did was check Facebook, just to put my mind at rest.  And thankfully, she’d been online recently.  I realise, this was all very silly.  If she really had died, somebody would almost certainly have told me.

All the same, when I saw her again at school today, I had to stop myself from hugging her, because she’s not the sort of person who hugs people often.  Isn’t it strange how much a dream can affect you?

Current listening: Jonathan Coulton, “Code Monkey”

Chapter 101 – Apologize

23 02 2009


research team 7. the bad guys. why am i not surprised?

you say that you’re sorry for the “incident” in america. you claim that it was a mistake, that it was poorly executed, that the individuals responsible were out of order, and that their actions do not represent your organisation as a whole.

well, i’ve got my own message for you, research team 7. not. good. enough.

you kidnapped me. me and sakura and her family. you transported us all the way across america in the darkness. you kept us locked up. if you think a few meaningless words on the side of a plastic box constitutes an apology, after everything you did, you are very sadly mistaken.

we haven’t made up our minds with regards to your offer. we don’t trust you. i hope you can understand that. but i want you to know that i despise you.

if you come after us again, i’m not running. if you even think about double crossing us, i will hurt you. and if you hurt any of my friends, you will find yourselves in more pain than you could possibly imagine.